Sexual facts

You are enjoying time with your partner, having crazy sex whenever possible, and after a point of time, the flow just stops. Yes, I am talking about the flow in the regularity of you and your partner having sex. Imagine yourself in such a situation.

Devastating, isn’t it? The truth is, this happens for real, and when it does, you become part of a plain and mundane life which none of you have envisaged.

It is not just affecting you physically, but mentally you feel exhausted as well. You try a mix and match of numerous things, but neither of you can work up the excitement. Your libido is just MIA (missing in action, of course,) and the entire act of lovemaking just becomes bland and predictable. You are unquestionably frustrated about it!

See, the thing here is, you love having sex, and are head over heels for your partner as well, but there are so many external factors that are stopping you. What are those and how to overcome them to bring back the spice into your bedroom and relationship? That’s what I am here for today. I have picked up the top tried and tested ways you can bring the zing back to your sex life and relationship. So, let’s set the ball rolling!

Be confident in your skin!

This comes right on top because if you don’t tick this off the box, you will end up in the same cycle soon enough. As a woman, you must always learn to appreciate yourself and the way you look. If you are someone who isn’t comfortable in her skin, it would be difficult for you to, first, appreciate your partner loving the way you look, and second, make your partner love you. Learn to see yourself naked in front of the mirror and admire the way your reflection stares at you in return.

As you do so, learn to embrace your problem areas. One of the most common areas of concern is the stretch marks. If you go outside and take a look, you will end up discovering women with various figures. Look at their confidence and be convinced that no one is of the ideal figure.

Communicate with your partner and ask what he (or she, as the case may be) likes about you. Note those pointers down and when you stand in front of the mirror naked the next time, appreciate those parts and touch them. Learn to compliment yourself and the way you look. This is a crucial step if you want to understand the way your body works and be confident in having sex with your partner.

Say no to sex!

Disclaimer – do not blame me if you get the shock of your life after reading this tip! What you can do, preferably, is thank me for giving you the most valuable advice ever. Yes, that’s right. While on the one hand, it might seem like an extreme step to take, on the other, you would be rather pleased with the outcome. Wait out there till I explain the logic behind this tip.

As you live with your partner, it is natural that sex becomes more of a routine than a powerful manifestation of your love and passion. This, in turn, takes away all the fun, and even when you try to bring it back, you fail. The next tip I am going to discuss is loosely based on Newton’s third law, which states that “Every action has an equal and opposite reaction!.”

How do you ask? The answer is simple. If you stay away from even the thought of trying to have sex with your partner for a long time, you will end up passionately making out when you can take no more. While you are at it, learn to make the most of foreplay. Tease your partner and play with yourself, if need be. Explore the unexplored parts of your partner’s body. 

As you do so, keep the lights dim and undress. If you have spoken with your partner earlier regarding parts that he or she likes about you, play with those parts and watch him or her want to do the same with you. They say that passion rests in the eyes. What you have to do is be watchful of how he or she is gazing at you. Feel the gaze and place your hands right where you feel the stare. Build up the anticipation till you cannot handle it anymore, but do not give in! Keep this happening for a night or two. Watch them pull you in a passionate embrace the next time you do so and bring in a night of steamy sex. (wink)

Communication is the key!

You must have heard this from a million people earlier, and yet, I will add to the list, and tell you about this once again. Communicate with your partner, as nothing can be more exhilarating than a heart-to-heart conversation with the one you love. This would not only impact your sex life positively but bring a new perspective to your relationship as well.

Coming back to the task at hand, tell your partner about where you want to be touched. Take his or her hand and lead it to those areas, if required. This primarily is of help when your partner is shy about traversing your body. Guiding the hands would also tell him or her about how much pressure to use and how would you like the movement to be. Alternatively, ask your partner to move the hands on your body and indicate if you like the way he or she wants to touch you or not.

This way, your partner would know what has been going wrong the entire time, and yet, be aware of the steps to be taken to correct the situation. As part of the conversation, you can also slip in if you want to experiment with enhancement pills or adult toys. Since you are interacting freely, this can easily pave the way to a conversation regarding the steps to be taken to fuel your desires. 

Routine is your enemy!

It is quite common that when you follow a routine in your regular life, you are more focused on completing the steps mentioned there. This often comes in between you and your partner, making both of you produce high levels of oxytocin. This chemical cancels out all the effects testosterone might have on you, thereby dimming all your need of having sex. 

To get rid of this, you need to break free from the restraints of a routine. Yes, take some personal time out to spend with each other, doing all the things you would otherwise not venture into. These can include high-adrenaline adventurous pursuits such as white-water rafting or rock climbing. Experiencing such new and exciting activities would take you back to the time when you were slowly venturing into the relationship, and everything was brand-new. 

The recognition that there is still a spark between you can make the blood rush to the veins, causing both of you to want each other. Additionally, the exhaustion from performing high energy sports stimulates the brain to release a chemical called dopamine, which is crucial for sexual desire. Don’t be surprised if your partner sees you laughing or breathing heavy, and pulls you close to a tight embrace, or smooch!

Embrace foreplay!

Yes, we live in the twenty-first century, and still, women have more chores to finish than men. This not only includes household but childcare as well. It is not always possible to be willing to make love after being tired of doing the chores. That is why it is crucial to turn these chores into fun. And progressively, let it slither into a passionate game of foreplay as well.

Mention to your partner, how you can wash dishes together, and yet spend romantic moments, all at the same time. Cherish the touch of your fingers as you are loading the dishwasher, or cooking dinner. Shower together and feel the cold water get steamy by the second as you apply soap all over your partner’s body. While this is one form of foreplay, the other is clearly on the bed. Keep experimenting with different things till you find what you might call your jam!

Conclusion: Overall, having a splendid time with your partner and rebuilding what you think you had lost over the years, is a great way to reach the point where you want to have sex once again. Yes, even after giving you these many tips, if you don’t understand, then let me get this straight – the fact that you are reading this is proof enough to know that you still care about your relationship. So, why waste what you still have and slowly let it dry? Embrace yourself and put on that sexy lingerie. Seduce your partner, and enjoy what’s going to come!